Age: I just turned 21, thanks
Location: Southend-on-sea. England.
Gender: Female. Last time I checked! Hoho, You didn't see that one coming!
Number of penpals wanted: I don't mind how many, hell: if I get any at all i'll be surprised!
What gender: I wouldn't mind a male one for a change, just to see what it's like. However I'm perfectly happy to have more female ones.
What age: Any. So long as the letters are readable and not crap.
Package trades: I don't know yet. Bring it up to me in a letter and I'll have a go.
Write me first, please. I'm snowed under trying to get my hair to lie flat, I simply don't have the time.
Music: Morrissey, The Smiths, The Cure, The Housemartins, The Futureheads, Mystery Jets, Ludes, Larrikin Love, The Beatles, L'arc En Ciel, Neutral Milk Hotel, Of Montreal, The Jam, They Might Be Giants, The Libertines, New Rhodes, Little Man tate, The More Assured, The Prodigy, UB40.
Hobbies: Listening to music, Sitting at my computer, Reading at work thinking up elaborate excuses to get out of work, imagining stuff that's not going to happen, dying my hair, projecting myself into small spaces, making dens out of blankets and clothes horses, harassing wildlife and genrally giving them a bad time, malingering, Proposing marriage, being anti-social, cynical, scornful and shy, thinking about piercings and then wimping out.
Dislikes: Horses. Kerbs. Fringes. Slobbery dogs. Long queues in the post office. Chavs cornering me and hassling me up with their majorly bad chav vibes.
Books: The wrong boy - Willy Russell, Any terry Prattchett, perks of being a wallflower, Starter For Ten hitchikers guide, The L shaped room - Lynn reid banks, any George Orwell, and Angela's Ashes and the sequel, 'Tis. Oooh, and the customary Harry Potter. As well as any Nick Hornby. I'm not an intellectual.
Movies: Party Monster, Roxanne, Napoleon Dynamite, Battle Royale, Happy Gilmore, Edward Scissorhands, Drop Dead fred, Pee wee's big adventure, Kiki's Delivery Service, My Neighbour Totoro, Pom Poko,
Television: The Mighty Boosh, Bottom, The Young Ones, Rising Damp, Porridge(sp?) Open All Hours, Black Books, Only Fools and Horses, Dr. Who, 'I Love' documentaries, 'Whatever You Want' on E4, Father Ted, The IT Crowd, Family Guy, The Smoking Room, Big Train, ANYTHING with Reeves and Mortimer.
Write a little about yourself: So many people tell me I'm strange. I refuse to accept this. I'm not really, I'm quite harmless in a rather sad way. I spend my spare time clawing at pictures or Morrissey and Robert Smith fomulating plans to kidnap either one. I like running up to strangers, tugging at their clothes, and squealing ''Where did you get that?!' My hair is always some stupid colour. I don't get out much, I dislike to socialise so I'm likely to respond to your letters promptly cause I'll be indoors in the dark, plotting. Unless I forget. I slave in an arcade for employment. I wonder if Rik Mayall/Alan Rickman/anyone will marry me?
READ THIS WITH YOUR EYES:
If I owe you a letter, or forgot to write to you or something, please tell me. I got a bit lost during Christmas.
This is me. Don't recoil.
However I mainly look like this now: I AM SAD